This was written by me when I was 17, when I had no self respect for my self and was really low on self esteem, I just fellt really down in general and the only way I could describe it was putting it into a sort of poem.
Rhoda Gamble, 23, Newcastle, UK
"STREET CRUD"
What am I, who am I
What can I do to tell
Where do I get my standards from
To measure me so well
What do others think of me
What image do I portray
I look at my reflection
And ask it everyday
I look in the mirror
What do I really see
Is it the person others make
Or is it really me?
The inner fear of others thoughts
Torment me everyday
Not happy with the face that I see
I often turn away
What if I do not conform
And become a fashion clone
will they turn, reject my love
Will I then be alone?
When the fear inside me swells
Being separate from the crowd
I look for those to pick upon
To make my self feel proud
The lowest form of feeling good
Is to tread upon another
To make them feel unwanted
So my ego can recover
Fragile ego, insecure,
Low esteem and shame
Is this what I really feel
When someone calls my name?
I feel shy not number one
Not easy with my self
Will I one day find true love
Or be left upon a shelf
They're trendy so they must be right
They're in, they all achieve
I'm not, I'm wrong, I'm only me
Not worthy to believe.
Just hold it there, just wait a sec
Take time to stop and think
What is it you tell yourself
That puts you on the brink
Is this how it really is
Or is it in your mind
Do we see ourselves like this
Or to ourselves be blind?
To be the you that you can be
The you locked up inside
Free yourself from deep within
No longer there to hide
You must believe in who you are
In all that you can do
And be prepared to give your heart
To others just like you
Through doing this that you will find
That others do the same
To give and not to ask return
To others just like you
And after you begin to like
the person in the glass
The one that used to turn away
Is now your friend at last
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